Finding Faith

One day, one moment is all it takes to change – everything.

 For Faith Broussard Cade, that day was Jan. 9, 2018. On her way to work that morning, another vehicle barreled into the back of hers. She sustained a concussion and an amalgamation of symptoms that, at first, had no common thread.

 So, she went undiagnosed for a long time. Terrible insomnia would keep her awake for days. The touch of clothing was excruciating. Reading and writing weren’t so simple anymore.

She meditated, used essential oils, listened to rain sounds – and nothing worked. Her life was falling apart inside and around her. So, a month after the accident she went on medical leave.

 “I could barely function,” she recalled. “That gave me the time and the space that I needed to have some come-to-Jesus meetings with myself.”

 She was eventually diagnosed with a traumatic brain injury, and her doctors ordered her to be home, relax, and basically, do nothing. It was a blank permission slip she hadn’t asked for and didn’t want. She felt guilty: mommy guilt, wife guilt, all-encompassing guilt.  

“We hear you, but it’s irrelevant,” her doctors said. “This is not a debate; this is not optional. If you do not allow your brain and body to rest, you will not recover from this.”

Living Self-Love

 Life forced her into a corner and demanded she make time for herself. She had to learn to indulge in moments of quiet and stillness, even when they were inconvenient and seemingly impossible to find. She needed a self-care routine that was simple, effective, and easy to incorporate into her daily life.

 So, about 4 or 5 months after the accident, she started writing notes to herself: notes of encouragement, gratitude and perseverance. At first, it was a 15-day challenge solely for herself.

Today I choose to love the parts of me that are still works in progress.

Today I choose to honor myself and my space by setting health boundaries.

Today I choose to show up for myself with the same about of dedication that I show for others.

Today I chose to push my past my fears and try something new.

Today I chose to hold myself to a standard of grace and not perfection.

 As she wrote these daily self-love notes to herself – and shared them with all of Instagram, something amazing happened. Messages of trials and perseverance began to pour in. They were heartbreaking. And, they were breathtaking.

Her short notes became “something that gave them the strength and tenacity to do the hard things and make the hard choices.”

When she shared her truth, it helped to free others from their own detrimental thoughts -- that somehow everyone else has their life together, and that they are the only ones struggling.

“That’s not reality,” Cade said. “That inner critic, that negative voice inside of us convinces us that we are not connected to anything or anyone. That we are alone, and that we are isolated.”

 No one, in fact, has found that magical sauce – everyone is just trying to do life the best way they can.

A Million Things

 “We’re always doing a million things, but we’re not completing a million things,” she said.  

 Changing that flawed behavior pattern is up to you, she believes. 

 It was a traumatic event that brought Cade to her new level of mindfulness, and for many people, the catalyst is something major: a loved one dies; a surprise, scary health diagnosis; or a career upended by layoffs. But, it doesn’t have to be.

 “It’s about waking up your awareness,” she said. “We have lost the ability to do one thing, to be in one place at one time, and to be present in the moment.”

 For example, she asked: “Can you be present in the shower?”

“When you’re brushing your teeth, just brush your teeth; if you’re putting on lotion, just put on lotion.”

Start small, and then build on those moments. Those moments become habits. And, those positive habits retrain your brain to put you first.  

“It’s not going to be easy when you start off trying to do this,” she said. “Your mind is going to fight you; your mind is going to betray you.”

 But, stick with it, she says. Be kind to yourself and to others. Give yourself time and grace. Give from your overflow, not your deficit.

Eventually, you’ll realize there’s a new you waking up to say: Hello. I am here. 

~ Joy Woodson, Editor Misspacklight.com